Ten years ago today, I became Mrs. Shawn Moffatt. But since I use my maiden name professionally, people often call my husband Shawn Mizzell. The fact that he doesn’t care is one of the many things I love about him.
After the ceremony, we rode in a horse drawn carriage to the reception. This photo appeared in Charleston magazine and captures the fairy tale essence of the moment. I was manicured and polished and wore a beautiful gown with a flowing veil. To add a dose of reality, there’s my friend, Page, in the background, carrying all my crap. We had a good laugh at that.
It was a beautiful day, but it passed as quickly as it came. Months before the wedding, I’d have dreams the day had arrived and I wasn’t prepared. I’d wake up, relieved to discover that I still had time to plan, to make everything “perfect.” When I think about June 10, 2000, I can still hear the bag pipes and pipe organ playing as I walked down the aisle, and the soloist singing the Lord’s Prayer a cappella from the balcony. I’m tearing up just writing this.
Fairy tale moments quickly give way to the realities of life. For example, during the ceremony, someone was breaking into cars– my parent’s included. Everyone did their best to keep that detail from me, but I found out anyway.
I’ve had years to process my wedding day and filter out all those tiny little glitches from my memories. I choose to remember all of the wonderful things… how we said our own vows and how my husband’s voice quivered when he spoke to me. How despite my objections, the groomsmen dressed up like the Village People and did the YMCA. Slightly tacky, but totally hilarious.
Ten years later, being Mrs. Shawn Moffatt is one of the few things I’m sure of. I dressed up like Cinderella, but we are equal partners. I’m not sure why the marriage works for him. But I know why it works for me. Of course, I love him, but sustaining a marriage takes more than that, I think.
Years ago we had reached a crossroads in our work and in our lives. It was sparked by a cross-country move– the move that inspired this blog. We were having an honest conversation about the things we wanted out of life, and at the time, we weren’t sure if we wanted the same things. We weren’t fighting or talking about breaking up or anything like that. But we were at a critical point in our marriage… when suddenly, everything felt so… hard.
“So what do we do about that?” I asked.
Without pausing he said, “Well, I want to stay married to you.”
It was in that moment that we realized that we were committed. Not just to each other but to all things we both need to feel happy and whole in life. Who we are inside and outside of the marriage. As a couple and as individuals. We’ve both made sacrifices for the other. But we have each other’s best interests at heart, and that has helped us navigate the challenges that come with building a life together.
Or as Shawn so eloquently puts it, neither one of us is crazy at the same time.
What a beautiful story – Happy Anniversary!
Angie, how beautiful and sweet! There sure is nothing like being married to your best friend and knowing that you support each other 100%, no matter what that entails. Congrats to you and Shawn for 10 fabu years..and many, many more to come and also share with your wonderful children!
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! ! What a beautiful story! I love the family picture, it speaks volumes of your love and commitment. Congrats!
Very touching! Just discovered your blog via twitter and am now a huge fan!
I am so proud of you for writing about your life so beautifully and for living your life so fully and so well.
Congratulations on your anniversary! It’s amazing how much we learn about ourselves and each other when we’re sharing life with someone we love
May you have many more happy, productive years together!
Hi Angie,
It’s belated: Happy Ten Year Anniversary!
What Shawn said about wanting to stay married to you would make a great book title. And I completely agree with the line about “not being crazy at the same time.” Isn’t that the truth? We all go off the marital deep end more than we care to admit.
Lovely photos. You look gorgeous!
Giulietta
p.s. Thank you for visiting my blog again. You always leave great comments.
Giulietta– you have inspired me once again!
Wow, how gorgeous were you two?! And look at your beautiful family 10 yrs later! Congrats, that’s a lot to be proud of. I think back now to how I was so worried about pew bows and the wedding cake and all these other tiny details. I mean, I loved planning my wedding, but it seems like I have all these REAL things to worry about now, you know? Life is so much better now — also harder, but better — than I ever imagined on my wedding day.
I am very glad I came across this blog. Happy Anniversary, and what an awesome post. I love your comments on commitment.. It seems so rare these days that people stick with one another through the really tough stuff. Kudos to you!
Best,
Hannah Katy
Wow. Reads like a fairy tale to me, except better. Happy (belated) anniversary!
And just to think…I was there!
Happy Anniversary…even if I flubbed the traditional song that was to be sung to you!