It's the little things...
I have this habit of writing things and forgetting I wrote them. This morning, I picked up the journal that sits at my bedside table and started flipping through the pages. My first reaction was, I wrote that? When did I write that?
I’m always impressed by my stream-of-consciousness writing… it’s full of insight. The words are rough and uncensored, but they make perfect sense. They remind me that truth resides within, and connecting with the truth always leads [Read more...]
At 35, I think I’ve finally earned the right to call myself a “grown-up.” At least it’s taken me this long to feel like one. And there are days I still have my doubts.
I spent my 20′s trying to figure out what success really meant to me… how it looked, how it felt, what I should be doing when. Oh, the dreaded success deadline. I was always [Read more...]
I’m playing the Prince song in my head… but two-oo thousand nine doesn’t have the same ring to it. It’s hard to believe 10 years ago, we were anticipating the New Millenium. Here’s a photo of my then-fiance, now-hubby just after midnight. We were both working at the CBS station here in Charleston. He was running audio for the nightly newscast. We were “live” as the clock struck 12… in case Y2K caused lots of crazy commotion and mayhem.
I had already completed my assignment, which is why I was able to run into the control room and steal a kiss. My job was to cover the “threat to our power system” which involved me calling SCE & G and asking, “Hey, did we lose power?” To which the spokesperson replied, “No, we didn’t.”
I thought it was ridiculous everyone had to work that night. Actually, it turned out to be one my best New Year’s celebrations. The station’s General Manager let us turn the sales department into a nightclub. One of our editors, aka DJ Greg, was spinning records. Our party came complete with disco ball, booze and catered buffet. Later, a group of us grabbed the cooler marked “Stolen from WCSC-TV” and took it back to my apartment. My friend, Frank, played guitar and we laughed and talked until the Post and Courier hit my front door.
That’s how you party like it’s 1999.
Ten years and two kids later… tonight’s going to be a lot more lame tame.
Ten years ago, I had no idea I’d be in this place, traveling a different professional path. I made choices that sent me into uncharted territory… forcing me to consult my inner compass for direction. I learned it’s never too late to follow my heart and revise the script. Tonight… I don’t need to be out on the town… to see and be seen. I’m content, right here at home.
Oh… and in case you’re wondering… we returned the cooler.
So tell me, did you party like it was 1999? Will this News Years Eve be different? What has the past decade taught you?
Cheers! See you next year… love saying that.
Recently I hosted the Charleston Holiday Parade for our local cable station, Comcast C2. It’s something I’ve done for the past four years and I really enjoy it. This year, as I dig deeper into my writing about a major life change that resulted in leaving the TV business… I’ve become well aware of the irony.
I still do TV work. And I still wear MAC.
I write a lot about crossroads, transitions, leaps of faith—but my goal is not to start a revolt… to encourage a whole Jerry McGuire “who’s coming with me?” movement. Although the changes I’ve made have been kind of like that.
I’ve been self-employed since 2003 and my resume is a curious maze… but for the most part I’ve been able to find freelance work in my areas of professional expertise. Over at my empire, Angie, Inc. (seriously, you’ve never heard of it?) I’ve accomplished things I’m very proud of, and I’ve learned a lot of new things, too.
Wearing MAC (a cosmetics line, in case you’re wondering) is just one aspect of my identity. I have learned not to let it define me, as it once did. But today, when people ask me “what do you do?” I want to crawl under a table. They want a quick definition and what I have for them is a bit longer… more like a book, an after school special, or maybe a series on Lifetime. Sorry, going off into my own little world again…
When people ask what we do, they really want to know who we are, and that can’t always be summed up in a resume, an elevator pitch, or a mission statement. The authentic me surfaces during spin class when I’m in “a zone” or when words bubble up from somewhere inside and I can’t get to pen, paper or my laptop fast enough. She’s in my laughter, my tears, the vulnerable side that I often protect… she’s in my clarity, my creativity and my strength. She is my heart, my soul… the part of me that transcends the boundaries of time and space.
I blog because it forces me to make a point… to find some purpose, some meaning behind my thoughts… to take my life experience and broaden the perspective so it’s relevant to you.
So I guess my point today and question for you is this… when you take away the labels… what’s left? That question can be terrifying. I used to think the answer was “Nothing… there’s nothing left.”
But that’s just not true. Not for me. And not for you.
Today, I’m honored to be featured over at The Sassy Steel Magnolia. My assignment: talk about a time when one of my secret sides revealed itself… how it happened and how I came to terms with it.
Last week, I declared my commitment to writing my story. Today, I take you on the road, to the time when my old life began to unravel, the catalyst for where I am, and who I am, now.
Follow me to The Sassy Steel Magnolia by clicking here.
ps- be sure to check out The SSM tomorrow– I’m selecting the mid-week music snack!
Many of the themes in my writing are inspired by a major life transition. If you follow this blog or know me personally, you know I used to work full-time in television news. I worked my way through the ranks: college degree in journalism, intern, producer, reporter and anchor. I did what most “successful” people are taught to do. Define the goal and then map out the steps to get there.
The mistake I made was thinking that success, aka the road to happiness, was linear. I was on the fast track and never expected to get derailed. But I did. And it wrecked me. And it was the best thing that ever happened. It took me a long time to see it that way… but I learned so many universal truths and now, in this stage in my life, I feel compelled to share them.
I explore this topic further over at Hybrid Mom. Click here to read part one of my story. Click here to read part two.
The two essays in no way tell the whole story, nor are they meant to. I wrote them as a simple gesture, to encourage my readers to listen to yourself, to trust what your heart is calling you to do. For me, the heart (not to be confused with emotion) is where the deepest truths, peace and fulfillment are discovered.
If you have a story to tell, I invite you to share it with me. Thanks for reading and participating in the conversation.
Angie
Click here to return the blog’s home page.
I’m a big fan of taking leaps of faith. Give me a ledge and you might have to tackle me to keep me from swan diving off the side. (Okay, I’m really holding my nose with a huge inner tube around my waist… but I’m still gonna jump.)
I give talks designed to inspire women to live authentically, to embrace their passions and make personal and professional decisions that reflect those passions. Even still, I don’t necessarily advocate they all quit their jobs, move across the country or make any other major life change without having that gut feeling, that inner knowing that whispers… It’s time.
Even when the soft echoes of fate are rooting for us to follow our hearts, it’s still not easy. We ask ourselves, “How can I really know I’m doing the right thing?” We don’t get a crystal ball or a road map detailing the new uncharted path we are about to take. When we step out on faith, we aren’t promised a path free from challenges and growing pains, but we do discover gifts and opportunities we never imagined.
If you’ve read my last blog post, you know I was feeling especially liberated after adding more memory to my aging computer. Creating more space on the hard drive inspired an all-out cleaning spree, and I marveled over the positive effects of clearing the clutter in my life.
So in the spirit of full disclosure, I think it’s important to let you know that over the holidays, my computer crashed. Again. For months I had been dealing with this technical difficulty. The computer would crash, and I would reinstall Windows, causing me to lose emails and anything else I had not backed up. The process would restore the computer to its original state– the way it was when I bought it in 2004. So I had to to upgrade Internet Explorer, Adobe, and reinstall all the video players. Each time I clicked the mouse, I’d have to download another something or other. I can’t believe I went through that process more than once. Try three times. Finally, when it crashed again, after I had plunked down a hundred bucks for more memory, I could have sworn the message on the computer screen said something like “Hey, lady, give it up. Buy a new computer.”
I think it’s a common trap we all fall into from time to time. We refuse to fail. So we do everything in our power to make our situation work. But I think there’s real courage in admitting, “I’ve tried. And tried. And tried. This just ain’t working.”
Letting go is not giving up. It’s not failing. It’s smart. If something is causing you ongoing stress, are you ready to loosen your grip? Do you have courage to listen to the voice within, when it whispers, It’s time?
If so, share your story and inspire others by commenting on this post.
I consider it a real gift when I have the opportunity to make meaningful connections with other women. I draw wisdom and inspiration from their journeys, and I often find a piece of myself in their personal stories. Recently, I had the opportunity to emcee the 14th Annual Administrative Professionals Day Conference, hosted by Trident Technical College. The event’s theme: Moving Forward. To me, moving forward means that we choose not to be victims of our circumstances; instead we use them as opportunities to learn and grow. We understand what we can control (ourselves) and the things we can’t (everything else). We rise above our negativity, fear, and pain to discover the lives we were created to live.
Continuing Education Division, and Nikki Hardin, Founder and Publisher of skirt! magazine. Nikki is a true example of a woman who had a dream, felt the fear, and pursued it anyway. She was 29 years old and a single mom of three when she started college for the first time. She earned a BA in literature, attended graduate school, and got “her first real, full-time job.” In 1985, she packed up and moved to Charleston, which she had never seen and barely heard of. A decade later, Nikki was “nursing a mid-life crisis” when a friend asked her, “What do you want to do?” She told him that she wanted to start a magazine for women that was interesting to read. And he asked, “So why don’t you do that?” So she did. In 1994, with only $400 to her name, skirt! was born. The magazine grew and in 2003, she sold the skirt! to Morris Communications, maintained her leadership role, and secured her retirement. Today, skirt! is in 20 cities. Bravo!
I also had the opportunity to meet Marshawn Evans, an attorney, business owner, and former contestant on The Apprentice. Marshawn is making her mark on the world, and she hasn’t even reached the age of 30. Marshawn was a young girl when she saw the vision of the successful woman she wanted be, watching the character, Claire Huxtable, on The Cosby Show. Marshawn and Nikki are excellent examples of women who had a vision, and despite challenges and setbacks, made a decision to move forward.
