Turning my attention back to home

Lately, I’ve felt a quiet but persistent pull back toward home. Not just the metaphorical home I often write about—the feeling of belonging, of creating a life that reflects who you really are—but the actual spaces we live in. The ones we spend our days moving through, where we do our best thinking, where we gather with the people we love.

I’ve always been drawn to the idea of home—it’s been a central theme in my writing for years. It’s the jumping-off point of my memoir. It’s the phrase that lived on my website for so long: Create a life that feels like home. And yet, somewhere along the way, I stepped away from that theme without even realizing it.

But now, I find myself coming back to it.

It started during the holidays, when our home was glowing with twinkling lights. I turned to Shawn and said, “If I could go back and do it all over, I’d be a home blogger. I would’ve been more intentional about documenting life while raising a family and figuring out how to decorate and create a cozy, organized home.”

And then, almost as quickly, I dismissed the thought. I know how to clean. I know how to host a gathering. But a home organizer and decorator? I am most certainly not. Perfectionism takes over, and I procrastinate on projects that feel important to me—some have been on my list for a decade or more. Our home has come a long way since we moved in 14 years ago, but it still feels like there’s always unfinished business hanging over me.

But after saying my fantasy about being a home blogger out loud, I realized something.

What I was actually saying is that the desire to create a life that feels like home is still very much inside me. I still long to explore what “home” really means—both the inner kind and the tangible, practical kind.

Maybe it’s because, after years of pouring myself into my work, I’m craving a sense of grounding. Maybe it’s because life is shifting—after losing my mom, after sending one son off to college—and I want our home to feel like an anchor, not just a backdrop to the busyness of life.

Over the next few weeks in my weekly email Hello Friday, I’ll be sharing more about this journey—what’s changing, what’s staying the same, and the small shifts I’m making along the way.